Enjoy... ^^

Boy : May I hold your hand?
Girl : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

Girl : Say you love me! Say you love me!
Boy : You love me...

Girl : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?
Boy : Sure, what's your phone number?

Girl : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
Boy : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple.

Girl : darling, I want to dance like this forever.
Boy : Don't you ever want to improve?

Boy : I love you and I could die for you!
Girl : How soon?

Boy : I would go to the end of the world for you!
Girl : Yes, but would you stay there?

Sharon : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?
Tracy : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

Man: You remind me of the sea.
Woman: Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
Man : No, because you make me sick!

Wife : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
Husband : You tell a woman something, it goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

Mary : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do you think?
Peter : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

Girlfriend : And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend : Dead sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.

Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?
Pupil : The moon.
Teacher : Why?
Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it.

Teacher : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Pupil : A teacher!

Waiter : Would you like your coffee black?
Customer : What other colours do you have?

My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

Teacher : Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam : It is a family tradition.
Teacher : What do you mean?
Sam : Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Teacher : What about your mother?
Sam : She is a woman.

Tom : How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?
David : You just send a telegram. Result declared, past year's performance repeated.

Teacher : Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student : Brotherly love.

Teacher : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.